Falling in Love

Wise men say only fools rush in
but I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay
would it be a sin
If I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
some things are meant to be
take my hand, take my whole life too
for I can't help falling in love with you
for I can't help falling in love with you

Ok, this song reminds me of me and my husband.We knew eachother 4 months before agreeing to get married. No he did not propose to me. I did it. Damn my strong willed ways. No rings were ever bought...by him. I bought him a wedding band. The ones that I wear I have paid for also. This is getting a little off topic though.
I am just unsure of where I stand with how I feel for him right now. He is the father of my son, he is my husband. I must love him, right? If I am supposed to why can't he make my heart stop like it use to? I know that as time progresses so does eveything else. I just find it hard admit that we can be head over heals in love with eachother one day and then the next its just different. Its as if it was never really there. I know it was, I can look at old pictures of us and see the looks in our eyes. The old feeling isn't there though. It feels more like a business agreement to me. I do my wifely duties and then I collect the check. I am the one who worries about the bills. I am the one who worries about Dalton.
What I do know is that I can not go back to how I was living before he left for Iraq. I will not go back to being that way. I can not just sit here all day and watch Dalton. It is a great life, but I need something more.
I will never marry someone again only after six months. What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger.